Stop Judging Me!

Who are you to judge? 

Stop judging me! 

It's wrong to judge.

Sound familiar? 

I am convinced that this culture is ruled by slogans, not by thought. A few popular slogan are listed above. And that's what they are, slogans. 

Does anyone even know what they mean when they say this? After all, a prisoner sentenced to the death penalty wouldn't say to the judge "you have no right to judge me! Who are you?" Because the judge would say, "well, me. I am both qualified, and have adequate information to judge."

But wait, that's not what people mean. After all, not everyone is in a court setting. 

No.

We are talking about looking down upon. 

Whenever someone says "don't judge me" to me, I always make them explain what they mean by it. Usually they don't know, or they will give some variation of what I just said. Don't look down on me.

We must keep these two definitions in mind; two different senses in which the word can mean depending on context. Either to asses information, or to look down upon. 

As Christians, we are called to judge, in the first sense. 

Matthew 7 speaks to this. Everyone uses the plank in the eye as a weapon to ward off anyone who calls them out on anything. But this is how the passage is meant to be taken, do not call someone out if you are doing the very same thing. Otherwise, call them out. Why wouldn't a brother or sister in Christ seek their greatest good and confront them in love? That isn't judging in the second sense, that is assessing, then pushing them to maturity. 

As for looking down upon? This is what the Bible calls haughty eyes, and is spoken against. Psalm 18:27 says that God delivers the humble, but brings down the one with haughty eyes. The way we speak about others reveals where our heart is at. If it is riddled with bitterness and attempts to undermine them, then that person is looking at others with haughty eyes. It often is disguised as false humility, and cloaks itself with good intentions, when at the core it is gossip. Haughty eyes is a sin that finds its origin so very deep within the heart, that often we act out of it without even noticing. 

What then? 

The cure for haughty eyes is humility, or other's centeredness, as Christ modeled. (Philippians 2) At the very least, every person is an image bearer of God, and deserves love and respect. And if he or she is a believer, that person is now identified in the inner man as the righteousness of Christ. To look with haughty eyes on a believer is to look down upon Christ, the righteous. But to asses and then push to maturity, as in the first sense, is to love them. To look with haughty eyes upon a believer is to reject Christ's righteousness within them. 

Life

Usually I don't write about myself.

Well, here goes.

This past year has blown me away. From growing in my leadership roll at GU, to getting a new job at Plato's Closet, and my girlfriend breaking up with me... A lot has changed in my life. 

A lot of things that I thought I knew, I had to reconsider.

Now it's the end of the semester, one year to go until I graduate. I am so excited to be an RA again and invest in these guys' lives. I know that God will work this summer through my job and the bible study I am leading. But I have come to a new mindset: closure.

Seriously, I should not be ok. I should be going to my room and crying myself to sleep every night. I am a sinful and broken person... If I had to rate my thought life it would be rated R. If I told you how many times I longed for people's approval you may think I'm a bottomless pit of neediness. 

But my life is an example for you, that you may know the Christ, and believe in Jesus to have life.

What else is there in life but to glorify God? If you can think of a higher calling tell me, but I promise you you cannot. Even as I write this I'm reading the verse that is on my wall in my room, "where your treasure is, there your heart be also." Matthew 6:21 Where is your treasure? What are you living for? If it is anything other than Jesus, you will find yourself in a never ending cycle of filling yourself with ash. The world leaves you in despair, in filth, in ruin... Even though on the front end it looked like life, it led to death.

This is my closure. Though I am sinful, though I am broken, and though I honestly feel very lost and stuck... Christ is my life. He is my life, and He is the giver of life. Apart from Him all I am and do is death, but through Him I can put aside what kills me and cling to Christ who loves me. 

Think about these things. Comment If you're going through something similar, or direct tweet me at @RichardEngIs 

Random Cultural Issue of the Day: Online Dating

Is online dating a good thing for Christians  I think there are many questions behind that question. First of all, what is the will of God? If we examine the scriptures, we find that the will of God is firstly to be something and then to do something. You do what you are, therefore, God changes us from the inside out. The problem is, most Christians believe God has some sort of straight line for them to follow, and if they sway by one wrong decision then they are outside the will of God. Honestly, I do not know how one can justify this view. From what I see, God wants us to be filled with the Spirit, address each other in psalms, hymns and spiritual songs, sing and make melody to the Lord in your heart, give thanks always, and submit as Christ submits. (Eph. 5:17-21) I also see the scriptures say that the will of God is sanctification away from sexual immorality, and to know how to control your own body in that respect. (Thess. 4:3-4) And lastly, to be transformed by the renewing of our minds. (Romans 12:1-2) These are just a few examples. The will of God is to be something, and then let our actions flow from that. 

Secondly, we must examine our intentions when it comes to online dating. If our intentions are to fill some emotional or spiritual hole in our lives by finding a mate... online dating, or any dating, could be destructive. The purpose of a relationship is to serve. (Phil. 2, Eph. 5:22-33) If we come to a relationship with the mindset of neediness, then the relationship will be doomed from the start. Only God can satisfy the deepest needs that humans have. Using dating relationships to fill that void is like trying to shovel dirt into a bottomless pit. It may feel like we are actually filling it at first, but it only makes us realize how empty we truly are. Only God can satisfy us fully, and stir up life in the deepest of our being.

Therefore, is online dating good? It depends on our intentions, and if we are in the will of God. Sometimes the will of God permits us to make decisions between two options that are amoral. Both could be good. This is why the Christian life is a life of discernment. Discernment is not deciding between what is good and what is evil, but between what is good and what is almost good. (Charles Spurgeon) Sometimes, depending on the situation, online dating could be a very good option for a believer who is both in the will of God, and satisfied in Him as well. This is why believers need renewed minds, to discern what is good and acceptable and perfect. (Romans 12:2) This maturity comes through spiritual disciplines, and learning to develop the mind. 

Meaning

Some of the deepest thoughts can come when you least expect them.

I want to matter.

Oh, how much there is in that statement. The longings of a boy reaching for the stars, the dreams of one who has yet to begin his life, the assumed values and worldview. All of these play a role.

I wonder how some don't go insane from that very thought. "I want to matter" could drive people to extremes. It leads men and women down roads they were not prepared to go, to give up morals just to be seen, and to fake arriving at the destination when really the horizon is always over the hill.

I want to matter.

Is this selfish? In what way do I want to matter? Just to be looked at as an icon? A watered down celebrity who smiles just like the rest? Or do I want to do something more.

I say the statement, "I want to matter" is deadly because we must say that there is a way of living that does not matter at all. But we also must say that "to matter" is an objective good, not a personal preference.

If it were only my preference to matter, then why can't my preference change? After all, sitting on the couch is much easier than it is to matter. To matter is hard. It means that you are submitting yourself to an ideal that may never happen. It may be your life's work to matter somehow, but if you never reach it, was it in vain?

I want to matter

Face it. This longing in all our hearts is not survival of the fittest. I may survive just as well, but be forgotten. Why must I be remembered? Why must I leave an impact.

We know there is more

It is counter intuitive to say there is nothing more. We long for greatness. We only fall to the depths of depression if we think we cannot attain it. But to be seen by men, to be perceived as a leader by the greatest among us is all we want. But this is vain. The greatest men will be forgotten. The books they write, the speeches they give, the men they influence... Will all be forgotten by men. This chase... Is vain. Except.

God looks at the heart

When I am alone, God sees what I am doing for Him.
When I feed the hungry, when I clothe the naked, I am doing these things for Him.
When I earnestly pray, and no one knows, God hears,
When I rub shoulders with someone and speak life into them, God rewards.

It is with God that we have meaning, purpose, vision.

It is with God that I matter

All Other Ground

I have had a song stuck in my head for about a month now. Well, more like just a few lines from the song.

"On Christ this solid rock I stand. All other ground is sinking sand. All other ground is sinking sand."

"All other ground."

Do we really realize what we're singing when we say that?

Things that come to mind for me are my friendships, my family, my talents, my dreams, my plans, my job, my future job, my future wife.

Really? All other ground? All of that put together seems pretty stable. I could prolly live just fine without Christ if I had a solid list like that one right?

Matt Chandler said it best, "all it takes is one text message, one phone call, one email, and your whole life is swept out from under you."

It is a funny thing... Having your whole life swept out from under you. And by funny, I mean not at all.

It happens to all of us, whether we like it or not. Our life will crumble at some point. Usually if one area crashes down we can manage, after all, we have the rest of the list. But one day it will all come down, and then where do we run to? For me, easily I can say that I run to porn. It gives me a false sense of security, of momentary pleasure. But all it is is sinking sand.

For others they will run to alcohol, drugs, relationships. Even video games. Why? To cope. To escape reality.

If it were up to me, when I am faced with my failures, or with a life that is falling apart, I would much rather run from it. Apart from Christ, apart from hope... What else is there?

That's why Christ is solid ground. We aren't simply waiting for all of these earthly things to fail us, to cause us to sink. To cause me to sink. But I can have assurance that Christ will get me through trials, and not only that, but have peace during the trial!

Oh, what a wonderful thing to fall into the arms of Christ. To worship Him. Because He is sufficient.

The abundant life that Christ offers does not happen when we are standing under our own strength, but when we surrender, and fall into His loving arms.

Honestly, who isn't exhausted from standing? I mean really, ask yourself, am I actually doing fine? I tell everyone I meet, every day that I'm "good." Am I actually good? Do I really want to continue pretending to be ok? When really I am hurting, and I have to constantly push it down... Just to keep the appearance.

The gospel of Christ, goes so much further than eternal life.

It is meant to impact and influence every area of your life, and make it abundant. You don't have to pretend. You don't have to limp through life. But stand in grace, knowing that through Christ you are able to be content in every circumstance.

Christ offers joy and peace, will you surrender to Him?

Taio Cruz and the Bible

As I have been learning and growing in becoming a youth pastor, I have been struck with the idea multiple times that popular music reflects the beliefs of today's youth. Whether the song is about partying, drugs, sex, or what have you, it seems to be in response to the culture, rather than creating culture.

Take the song "Hangover" by Taio Cruz. Here are the lyrics to the chorus:

I got a hangover, whoa!
I've been drinking too much for sure
I got a hangover, whoa!
I got an empty cup
Pour me some more

So I can go until I blow up, eh
And I can drink until I throw up, eh
And I don't ever ever want to grow up, eh
I wanna keep it going, keep keep, keep it going, going, going, going....

Let's take a look at the ideas that are being described here.

1) Clearly there is a sense of going too far into drinking, but an apathy toward it. There can only be the sense of drinking too much if one has the knowledge of what an appropriate or "right" amount would be. This lyric greatly influences the second half of the chorus...

2) "So I can go until I blow up" and "I can drink until I throw up" shows that this person knows the consequences of their actions, but does not care. Apathy, not ignorance, is the theme here. This strongly reflects the youth culture. Many teenagers live their lives in a way as if they will not have any consequences for their actions. This destructive, and/or self-harmful pattern is made manifest in activities such as partying, drinking, bullying, cutting, porn, premarital sex, etc.

3) Lastly, "I don't ever ever want to grow up." For some reason, this culture is absolutely obsessed with being young. Never before in history have people from every stage of life try to look like a teenager. They dress like them, get plastic surgery, are constantly trying to stay fit to the end of having the body like a young person. We idolize the stage of youth. It is being sold like a new car; who would ever want an old 91 Ford Tarus when they could have a 2013 Lexus? (Consequently the Ford is what I drive.)

Let me respond to each of these ideas using scripture and Biblical principles. For full effect please look up each reference. (This section is directed specifically to believers in Jesus. If you do not believe in Jesus, shoot me an email and we can talk: Reng91@gmail.com)

1) "Apathy" is suuuuuuch a buzz word in Christian circles. I get annoyed with how much is it used myself. But let's not get apathetic about apathy. One of the biggest tools that the devil uses to disable believers is to get them to not care. If he can convince you that sitting on your butt and playing video games is a better use of your time than to read your Bible? He's won. If he can get you to church on Sundays and Wednesdays, you hear the message, but you don't care enough to apply it? He's won. If you are disabled as a believer, you're worthless in the Kingdom. Don't be worthless when it comes to the work of Christ.

Romans 12:11, Ephesians 5:15-16, Psalm 51: 16-17

2) What goes in comes out. What you set before your eyes you will think about; what you think about you will act on. When have you ever done something good and tried to lie about it? When you bought a homeless man a meal, did you cover it up and say you were just out for a stroll? When we sin, we hide. When we do good, we are not afraid. Whether or not we flaunt it or keep the good you did you and God, you don't feel guilt over good things. But you do over sin. The list from point 2 above that I gave, comes from the heart. What is going on in your heart that is leaving you trapped in sin?

Galatians 6:7, 2 Corinthians 9:6, Matthew 6:22-23, Romans 6:11-14

3) Finally, I cannot think of a better way to make this point than to say what my girlfriend said. "Enjoy every stage of life." I love that. I remember watching The Land Before Time when I was little, and all Little Foot wanted to do was be older so he could do more stuff. But then his grandparents said something when he wasn't there. They said something like, "when you're young, all you want to be is be older. But when you're old, all you want to be is be younger." We are never content with where we are at, or what we have. Read Ecclesiastes for Pete's sake! But when we get older... grow up people. Youth is great, but it is just one stage of many on life's great journey. If you're stuck in the future or in the past, you'll miss the present!

Ecclesiastes 1:8, 2 Timothy 2:22