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Thursday, May 2, 2013

Random Cultural Issue of the Day: Online Dating


Is online dating a good thing for Christians  I think there are many questions behind that question. First of all, what is the will of God? If we examine the scriptures, we find that the will of God is firstly to be something and then to do something. You do what you are, therefore, God changes us from the inside out. The problem is, most Christians believe God has some sort of straight line for them to follow, and if they sway by one wrong decision then they are outside the will of God. Honestly, I do not know how one can justify this view. From what I see, God wants us to be filled with the Spirit, address each other in psalms, hymns and spiritual songs, sing and make melody to the Lord in your heart, give thanks always, and submit as Christ submits. (Eph. 5:17-21) I also see the scriptures say that the will of God is sanctification away from sexual immorality, and to know how to control your own body in that respect. (Thess. 4:3-4) And lastly, to be transformed by the renewing of our minds. (Romans 12:1-2) These are just a few examples. The will of God is to be something, and then let our actions flow from that. 
Secondly, we must examine our intentions when it comes to online dating. If our intentions are to fill some emotional or spiritual hole in our lives by finding a mate... online dating, or any dating, could be destructive. The purpose of a relationship is to serve. (Phil. 2, Eph. 5:22-33) If we come to a relationship with the mindset of neediness, then the relationship will be doomed from the start. Only God can satisfy the deepest needs that humans have. Using dating relationships to fill that void is like trying to shovel dirt into a bottomless pit. It may feel like we are actually filling it at first, but it only makes us realize how empty we truly are. Only God can satisfy us fully, and stir up life in the deepest of our being.
Therefore, is online dating good? It depends on our intentions, and if we are in the will of God. Sometimes the will of God permits us to make decisions between two options that are amoral. Both could be good. This is why the Christian life is a life of discernment. Discernment is not deciding between what is good and what is evil, but between what is good and what is almost good. (Charles Spurgeon) Sometimes, depending on the situation, online dating could be a very good option for a believer who is both in the will of God, and satisfied in Him as well. This is why believers need renewed minds, to discern what is good and acceptable and perfect. (Romans 12:2) This maturity comes through spiritual disciplines, and learning to develop the mind. 

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